Things only drunk people will understand

I was gonna put this list up, so I wouldn't forget. I don't think anyone will understand it (or find it funny) except T-ir. Drunken jokes:

1. My ass cheeks are my children. One of them works in insurance, the other is a jeweler.
2. Tasmania is a giant pinball table. Whenever the silver ball goes past the flippers, the Tasmanian people come out of their houses (which are the bumpers) and harvest their crops.
3. The most insane way to wake someone up is to throw rainbow trout at them. Imagine waking up to a spazzing rainbow trout in your lap!
4. When Lani passes out, he cannot be cracked in interrogation. He will not say anything to good cop, bad cop. He maintains that he knows nothing. He always keeps cool under pressure. One face Lani.
5. Anything that lani breathes into his nose (while passed out) turns immediately into steak. In that way, he never goes hungry. When he is thirsty, he eats steak rare and drinks the blood.
6. One day, Lani will pass out and wake up in the future world, which will unfortunately be populated by cloned versions of Quicky. Who call each other gay. All the time.
7. Me and T-ir are Pharoahs, who are having a pyramid-off.

Hmm, that's all I remember.

People with a fast internet connection should have a look at this. Mario Bros. being played on a marimba.

Also, an album of songs played in the style of 8-bit nintendo. I'm interested to see how superfreak came out.