I discriminate against non sexy people

As I was walking home tonight, completly off my nut, I witnissed something that was just off the radar. I cut across the school oval (like I always do), and noticed a strange light right at the corner of the basketball court. There was a guy with a metal detector trawling the oval. I kid you not. I walked past him, then turned around and asked "what are you looking for" and he replied "things". He had a light on his hat and everything. I'm talking 5:30am complete darkness. What are the odds of a man with complete metal detecting gear, losing something metallic?

Oh and my mobile phone has been acting up. So if anyone sent me a message between now and I dunno when, chances are I didn't get it. And it's been messing up my phone calls as well, as it says that my phone is disconnected or something. It's not. I've reseted my phone and all is good. Continue sending me random swear words